Do you find yourself losing positivity on hard days?
Are you annoyed by unrealistic optimism?
There’s a balance. There always has to be balance. I am a positive person. I suffer with depression. Believe it or not these two parts of me are equally important and co-exist. I see the best in people, I use kindness, I get excited by positive people. However, I have days when negativity seems to take over. It wraps it’s ugly little hands around me and clings for dear life. These days are hard, these days are dark and I struggle still to pull myself out of them.
But I have managed to make a shift in mindset. This mindset stays with me always now. Even when I hear my inner critic start to scream, I chose to listen to the quieter voice instead. It’s a kinder voice, but it’s more gentle. You have to REALLY listen. There’s ways to hand this voice the microphone … There’s ways to make it speak more clearly. There’s people who encourage that voice, there’s people who recognise that the other voice, the negative one, is a liar. These are the people to stick with. These are the people that support you. If there are none of those people around, that’s okay, because I think it starts with you anyway. Start loving yourself, saying positive things to and about yourself, show kindness and the positive people will come … We attract each other. Be open, be kind and listen.
Okay I know this is all well and good on a good day. Not so easy on a tough one. Or in a tough time, I hear that. I hear that very clearly. So here’s where I suggest you start your positive journey …
Here’s some resources to use if your soul isn’t up to much.
Lavendaire (aka Aileen Xu) has been inspiring me for I don’t know how long. I went searching for something on YouTube two years ago and stumbled upon her KonMari tutorials. I started watching her stuff because I thought her voice was soothing and her videos are just really beautiful. She talks about life as a creative person, gives book/music/beauty/media/etc recommendations but also just spreads a message of acceptance and support. She is the one who motivated me to start giving my years a theme and it is honestly the best idea if you want an alternative to New Year Resolutions. This actually works (2017 is the year of self love). Through time I have fallen in love with her message, her positivity, her spirituality and calm sense of self. She is just very candid, very motivated and positive and so full of a natural wisdom. She is beautiful to listen to or watch and I highly recommend getting on board with the Lavendaire Lifestyle. Her positive energy is infectious.
Catch her YouTube Channel ..
Or she has a podcast called “The Lavendaire Lifestyle”.
2. Rupaul’s DragRace
It’s not just a cheesy reality TV show. It’s a way of life. If you don’t know, RPDR is a reality competition to become THE NEXT DRAG SUPERSTAR. It’s not only fun but actually so uplifting and empowering for so many reasons.
- Drag is all about celebrating the powerful women throughout history, bringing them to life and raising them up. The discourse around women is one of power, strength and ferocity, women are respected in the drag community probably more than anywhere else. It’s also about fucking with gender, bending the rules of social normalcy. Basically sticking it to the man.
- Drag is inclusive of all body types. The big queens are just as fabulous and fierce competitors as the small ones. A plus size queen is a threat. They are amazing, they are beautiful, they are creatures of pure FAB.
- Drag queens are sadly, usually survivors of intense adversity. They know what it is to struggle, they know what it is to be different and so their advice is worth listening to.
“My attitude toward friendship has remained the same. I will support and encourage you with all the love in my heart, but if it’s not reciprocal, I gotta go […] If your friends are bitter about your success to the extent that they act out, don’t expect them to change […] Move on.” Rupaul
“I want people to realize, that it’s okay to make mistakes, it’s okay to fall down. Get up, look sickening, and Make Them Eat It!” Latrice Royale
“Being booed off stage is just an applause from ghosts!” Sharon Needles
“For all the queens who tell me I’m not polished enough, they just need to know, I’m polish remover bitch” Adore Delano
Pretty much everything on the show is quotable gold but these are some of my favourites. As well as watching every episode of Drag Race you can get your hands on (season 2-9 on Netflix) I would recommend Rupaul’s podcast “What’s the Tee”. It’s all about over coming your inner demons.
peculiar I know but I have been so uplifted by so many snapchatters. If you want to watch me talk about body positivity, mental health, feminism and the day to day survival of a depressive person follow yhegarty1. But you know me, I want to introduce you to some people you might not know but who may lift your spirits. They definitely have helped to lift mine.
- Kelly (kelsxabi) Holistic healing, positivity, mental health awareness
- Naoise (naoichan) Body positivity, kinky sex, kindness, bdp awareness, chronic pain awareness.
- Alex (happybeingme70) positivity, feminism, break up grief
- Caroline Kay (carolinekay117) positivity, kindness, music, just fucking hilarious really.
- Dainty Dress Diaries (daintydiaries) crafts, fashion, positivity, goal setting, being in touch with the universe.
- Caterina (cannacat) ptsd survival, positivity, marijuana advocate, just over all one of the sweetest souls I’ve ever met.
This is to name just a few, I’m getting to know more and more every day. What’s the common thread throughout? The key word … POSITIVITY. All these people are sharing it … for free!!! Jump on that band wagon.
So I won’t over load you with more than that for now.
I hope it helps. Be positive, Be free and remember negativity is a liar … don’t listen to it.